9 Questions To Help You Find Your Weight Loss Solution

9 Questions To Help You Find Your Weight Loss Solution

The real solutions on your weight loss journey are counterintuitive. 9 questions to ask to find the solution to any problem WITHIN yourself.Problems present themselves in our lives and sometimes the solution to that problem is counterintuitive. It can be different — or even opposite of — what we may assume works or what we have tried before. 

We can adapt to the current situation and find a solution that works now or we can resist and keep doing what we’ve always done. We can choose to think outside the box. 


Internal versus external solutions

I am a light sleeper. I wake easily and I’m sensitive to light. I spent the majority of the last 20 years fighting with my environment to try to meet my body’s nighttime requirements and ending up feeling angry, irritated, and tired when I couldn’t manage my family’s behavior enough to get a good night’s sleep.

Then I came up with a counterintuitive solution. Instead of relying on everyone and everything around me to change, I would change

I found some small earplugs that I could wear comfortably all night, and an eye mask that blocks out the light, and now my solution fits in the palm of my hand and I sleep soundly all night. 

I found an internal solution.

Often, we think the solution on our weight loss journey is to change everything outside of ourselves when the solution actually resides within us. 

We try to change our environment, removing all of the tempting foods from the house. We follow a strict meal plan created by someone else. We ban ourselves from eating anything from a drive through. We go to great lengths to change what goes into our mouths.

But the real solution, the opposite, different or counterintuitive solution, is actually to look at and change WHY that food goes in our mouths

It’s not to remove the food from our lives so it can’t control us. 

It’s taking back control and learning to eat on our terms. 

It’s experimenting and finding out what works for our individual bodies.

It’s using the power of our minds to create solutions that work.

Ask yourself: 

  • Where am I looking outside of me for a solution that exists inside of me?
  • What are some of those inside solutions? 


Rushing to lose weight doesn’t work

Another problem that requires some thinking outside the box is urgency in weight loss. We want to rush to the finish. We want to get to the part where we don’t have to see that number on the scale or hear the mean things our brain has to say about it as fast as possible.

Our typical solution to this is to take extreme measures. But the counterintuitive solution is actually to slow down. 

That urgency is a message. It is signaling to us that we are believing the lie that something outside of us will make us feel better inside. This is never true

If you heard a grinding sound when you drove your car, you wouldn’t put a fresh coat of paint on it or drive faster and see if it goes away. That makes no sense. You would slow down and look under the hood. That’s what we need to do here.

We need to slow down and look at our current beliefs about our weight number and what it means about us. 

Slow down and look at what we are feeling that makes us want to escape with food. 

Slow down and remind ourselves that our thoughts are optional.

Ask yourself:

  • Where am I feeling urgency and what message is it sending to me? 
  • How can I slow down? 


Ongoing problem solving

Is what are you doing creating the results you want? Do the results you are getting align with your ultimate goals? 

If the answer is no, it doesn’t matter how right or good or how long you’ve been doing it. It’s time to think outside the box.

On Dr. Drew’s podcast, he and another physician were talking about addiction treatment in comparison to how we approach cancer treatment. We don’t just try one type of chemo. 

We keep trying different kinds and combinations and address new problems that come up along the way. We don’t give up until we figure it out. They called it ongoing problem solving. 

This is exactly what we need to be doing during our weight loss journey. There isn’t an exact combination of food that works for everyone at every stage of their lives. 

We try things, we see what results we get, and then we try different combinations of things and we see what results we get. 

We approach it with curiosity and commitment and we figure it out. 

Ask yourself: 

  • Am I doing what I’m doing because it’s what I’ve always done?
  • Is it yielding the results I want?
  • What’s something else I can try?


Food doesn’t fix or create feelings

We often look to food as the solution for discomfort or escaping problems. It is also used for celebrations, fun and rewards. 

However, it’s a temporary and pretend solution. We have to think outside of that box! 

The food is not creating the feeling of celebration. If it did, that half-eaten cupcake in the trash, if consumed, would create celebration in you. My guess is, if you have ever eaten a cupcake out of the trash it did not feel like celebration.

The food is also not creating actual escape from stress, overwhelm or boredom. 

After the food is gone, that feeling shows back up, now accompanied by shame, guilt, disappointment, or some other companion feeling. So what’s the counterintuitive solution to dealing with feelings that doesn’t include food?


Choose to feel your feelings

The opposite of escape is to stay. We can choose to stay in our bodies and allow the discomfort to be there. 

We can choose to go inward where comfort, reward and celebration are actually created and experienced.

Outside the usual box, we can open ourselves up to learning what our feelings feel like in our bodies. We can discover that there is nothing to fear about discomfort. 

We have the space to discover what else we can believe that will create the feelings that we want to experience. 

Ask yourself:

  • What feeling am I looking to escape or create? 
  • How can I stay and find what I’m looking for within me?

If you want more in-depth instructions on how to do this feeling work, check out 4 Steps To Process Your Emotions Using Expansion


Here’s a recap of all 9 questions you can ask to find a counterintuitive weight loss solution that will work for you:

  1. Where am I looking outside of me for a solution that exists inside of me?
  2. What are some of those inside solutions?
  3. Where am I feeling urgency and what message is it sending to me? 
  4. How can I slow down?
  5. Am I doing what I’m doing because it’s what I’ve always done?
  6. Is what I’m doing yielding the results I want?
  7. What’s something else I can try?
  8. What feeling am I looking to escape or create? 
  9. How can I stay and find what I’m looking for within me?


This kind of thought work is invaluable on your journey to losing weight for life. If you’re ready to get started, watch my free video on how to lose the first five pounds — and keep going.

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Meet Natalie

I spent over 2 decades battling my weight and hating my body, before I found a solution that worked FOR GOOD. I lost 50 pounds by changing not just what I eat, but WHY. Now I help other women like me get to the root of the issue and find their own realistic, permanent weight loss success. Change is possible and you can do it. I can help you.

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